The Way of the Wild Heart

I've just finished reading this book called "The Way of the Wild Heart: A Map for The Masculine Journey" by John Eldredge. Many of the things mentioned really spoke to my heart, as I thought about my growth as a man till date.

Here's a brief summary of the book, extracted from this website.

"This is a book about how a boy - and a man - becomes a man.

It's a guide to the process of masculine initiation - that ancient path every boy and man must take if they would become the man they long to be. The path whereby they come to know they are a man and are able to live and love from a deep, centered strength.

We live in a time where most men (and boys) are essentially fatherless. Whatever their circumstance, they have no man actually taking them through the many adventures, trials, battles, and experiences they need to shape a masculine heart within them. They find themselves on their own to figure life out, and that is a lonely place to be. Their fears, anger, boredom, and their many addictions all come out of this fatherless place within them--a fundamental uncertainty in the core of their being.

But there is a way."

According to John Eldredge, there're 6 stages to a man's growth. Omitting any of the stage may have consequences at the later part of life.

Stages Involved:
1. Beloved Son
2. Cowboy
3. Warrior
4. Lover
5. King
6. Sage

Beloved Son (0 to about 12 years old)
It's a time of wonder and exploration. It's also a time whereby he needs to know that he is loved, valued and adored by a father. His need for affirmation and love is of utmost importance at this stage.



Cowboy (13 to about early 20s)
It's a time of adventures and testing. The young man has a craving for something dangerous, fun and exciting. The question that he centres his life among is "Do I have what it takes?"



Warrior (early 20s to late 30s)
This is a time for the fighting spirit in man be awakened. There is a need to find a cause to fight for. It can be for the military or for the university degree that he so much wants. The inner resolution and many disciplines in life have to be acquired at this stage. He needs to live in courage and be ready to fight any time.








Lover (Overlap with previous stage)
This is a time whereby a man awakens to beauty in life. He finds himself getting intensely passionate about a girl. The romantic feelings in him begins to stir and stir. And not just this, the man begins to find a connection to his own heart.




King (early 40s to 60s)
Now, the man is in key leadership position. He 'rules' over a domain with authority, and that includes his family as well. He is at the most powerful stage of his life. And he is not alone. He leads a company of young warriors and is a living example of courage and compassion.


Sage (60s and beyond)
This is really a stage whereby gray hair and wrinkles are obvious. Along with it comes wisdom. The wealth of knowledge and experience of a sage is of great value to the younger kings and warriors. Though a sage may not say much, his presence and influence is great beyond measure.